Thursday, April 17, 2008

Life have been rather stale these days.

Somehow, i felt i am distanced by everyone. I can't seem to find a sense of belonging with anyone. Everything these days is so so superficial. Superficial to the stage i feel sick of it.

Maybe it is because of my innate fear of being too intimate with anyone that causes me to be singled out in the world. Truth be told, i am afraid of anyone entering my innermost wall and looking at me bare naked.

Yes, i may have close friends. But, how well do they know me? I keep hell lots of things inside me, never uttering a word to anyone. And i am sure they are in a way frustrated with me too.

Furthermore, because of my refusal to break out of my inner wall and my refusal to overcome my fear of being too intimate with anyone, relationship failures are common.

I think... i need to look at myself again...