Sunday, June 10, 2007

Tired Week...

This week is horrible. It is very very tiring mentally.

This week, we did a lot of dives. In fact, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday was spent on diving. Now diving itself is fun, no doubt. What is tiring is that we have to set up the things required and keep it all at the end of the day. The monotone routine is so so boring and we did it for three days straight. Sianz.

Over at my unit, everyone is divided into teams and there are equipment specified to the team to take care of. It just happened that this week, my team equipment sort of "moved house" and it is sian and tiring to take note of the different locations my team's equipment is housed. Sianz.

Wednesday was my duty day and i planned to spent it quietly in camp with a good comic. However, i received a shock and my mood was spoilt, totally. I feel so helpless, so useless.

I got to know Prem not too long ago and we kind of hit it off well. Maybe it is because of the drinking sessions or maybe it is because of Chee Kiat but whatever it is, it is always good to see him around. Than, i received bad news about his girlfriend condition and i don't know, i just feel so shocked and worried. As Pei Qiang said, her life is hanging on a thread and her condition is swaying from critical to stable and back to critical and you got what i mean. I pray that everything will go well and that her condition will just remain stable and hope that she will have a speedy recovery.

On the next day, another message came and this time, i am simply stunned. The message was regarding a funeral but the deceased was not someone i expected. I attended the wake today and i don't know whether is this friend of mine(glad that he still remember me) taking it well. Although i am assuming that he is taking it better this time but it might not be the case. 2 funerals in less than 5 years is not something a person can take it so easily. Furthermore, that look on his face is the same for both funerals and i am really kind of worried that he might just break down. There is long story here and i have no plans of elaborating it but i do hope he can get over it soon and move on. It is definitely not a easy task and i really hope i can give him whatever support he needs.

This 2 pieces of sad news is not something i want to receive and i just feel so helpless cause there is nothing i can do for them other than to chant. I can feel their pain but i don't know what to do to ease the pain in them. Haiz.

Furthermore, Yong Hoon, my Korean friend, is leaving on Monday, for good. Although i know he will be leaving soon but you know, we always thought that "soon" is still far away. It is only when the date draw near that you feel the longing for him to stay and not go. Haiz.

This week is definitely not a good week. So many sad things happened all at once and i feel overpowered by them and i am so lost. It is like being stuck in a puddle of mud and you can't move forward or backward but to stay in your original position.

How i wish i have someone to just listen to what my heart have to say...

And don't suggest my family members, they have their own problems and that last thing i want to do is to add to their burden.